| Date: | 2006-07-01 13:51 |
| Subject: | What the hell? |
| Security: | Public |
| Mood: |  amused |
My fiancee (did I mention Ms. Yahoo and I are engaged? Yes, we are) owns a yarn store--or, really, two of them: a real one (in Washington state) and a virtual one (on eBay). Sometimes I do work for her. An unexpected consequence of this is that I spend some of my days taking pictures of yarn.* Life is strange.
*Eat your heart out, Sarah. :)
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I haven't blogged for a hell of a long time. But here I am at work, testing out Flock and its blogging features. In short, wasting time. I am one hell of an employee.
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All over the world the rain was pourin'
I was scratchin' where it itched
Oh heartbreak and despair got nothing but boring
So I grabbed you baby like a wild pitch
It takes a leap of faith to get things going
It takes a leap of faith you gotta show some guts
It takes a leap of faith to get things going
In your heart you must trust
Now your legs were heaven your breasts were the altar
Your body was the holy land
You shouted "jump" but my heart faltered
You laughed and said "Baby don't you understand?"
It takes a leap of faith to get things going
It takes a leap of faith you gotta show some guts
It takes a leap of faith to get things going
In your heart you must trust
Now you were the Red Sea I was Moses
I kissed you and slipped into a bed of roses
The waters parted and love rushed inside
I was Jesus' son sanctified
Tonight the moon's looking young but I'm feelin' younger
'Neath a veil of dreams sweet blessings rain
Honey I can feel the first breeze of summer
And in your love I'm born again
It takes a leap of faith to get things going
It takes a leap of faith you gotta show some guts
It takes a leap of faith to get things going
In your heart you must trust
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Huge, huge developments. A) I'm afraid, after twenty-two long and indescribably frustrating years, the sexual drought has ended. This of course upends the entire raison d'etre of the blog. B) As the aforementioned would suggest, I have a girlfriend (!!!!!). She is a force of nature (it took me a while to take everything in, which led to some rather embarrassing misjudgments early on) and she really, really likes me. She's cute, too. :) Here I'm tempted to think, "This is too much good fortune to actually be occurring," but....
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http://www.alternet.org/mediaculture/34072/
Posted without comment. Well, one: If you've wondered how badly the human brain can be damaged and still support life, here is your answer.
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Horking up loogies since last Monday: it's the bronchitis, which I haven't had for some time. The thought occurs to quit smoking. Thought is quickly rejected when I realize how poorly I'd fare in prison.
Day 8053: No sexual activity. It goes without saying.
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Day 8047: No sexual activity.
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The story has grown more complex, if that's possible.
More later.
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| Date: | 2006-04-04 13:13 |
| Subject: | Observation |
| Security: | Public |
| Mood: |  numb |
That's right: my life is a "Seinfeld" episode.
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| Date: | 2006-04-04 12:39 |
| Subject: | On compromise |
| Security: | Public |
| Mood: |  contemplative |
The Big Muddy
Billy had a mistress down on 'A' and 12th
She was that little somethin' that he did for himself
His own little secret, didn't hurt nobody
Come the afternoon he'd take her wadin'
Waist deep in the big muddy
Waist deep in the big muddy
You start out standing but end up crawlin'
Got in some trouble and needed a hand from a friend of mine
This old friend, he had a figure in mind
It was nothing illegal, just a little bit funny
He said, "Now, don't tell me the rich don't know, sonny
Sooner or later it all comes down to money"
And you're waist deep in the big muddy
Waist deep in the big muddy
You start on higher ground but end up crawlin'
Well, I had a friend said, "You watch what you do
Poison snake bites you and you're poison, too"
How beautiful the river flows and the birds they sing
But you and I, we're messier things
There ain't no one leavin' this world buddy
Without their shirttail dirty
Or their hands a little bloody
Waist deep in the big muddy
Waist deep in the big muddy
You start on higher ground but end up somehow crawlin'
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| Date: | 2006-04-04 12:17 |
| Subject: | So true |
| Security: | Public |
| Mood: |  cynical |
It's Money That Matters
Of all of the people that I used to know
Most never adjusted to the great big world
I see them lurking in book stores
Working for the Public Radio
Carrying their babies around in a sack on their back
Moving careful and slow
It's money that matters
Hear what I say
It's money that matters
In the USA
All of these people are much brighter than I
In any fair system they would flourish and thrive
But they barely survive
They eke out a living; they barely survive
When I was a young boy, maybe thirteen
I took a hard look around me and asked what does it mean?
So I talked to my father, and he didn't know
And I talked to my friend, and he didn't know
And I talked to my brother, and he didn't know
And I talked to everybody that I knew
It's money that matters
Now you know that it's true
It's money that matters
Whatever you do
Then I talked to a man, lived up on the county line
I was washing his car with a friend of mine
He was a little fat guy in a red jumpsuit
I said "You look kind of funny"
He said "I know that I do"
"But I got a great big house on the hill here
And a great big blonde wife inside it
And a great big pool in my backyard and another great big pool
beside it
Sonny it's money that matters, hear what I say
It's money that matters in the USA
It's money that matters
Now you know that it's true
It's money that matters whatever you do"
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Day 8044: No sexual activity.
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And for the record: day 8039. No sexual activity.
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Sooner or later it all comes down to money....
More tomorrow.
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| Date: | 2006-03-25 01:53 |
| Subject: | PSA |
| Security: | Public |
| Mood: |  lethargic |
Note to statisticians: the "no-sexual-actvity" watch will continue on a weekly basis. Because, let's face it.
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So, a while ago, in an effort to become as pathetic as possible, I created an account on the aptly named Yahoo! personals. First I try sending out a series of the free "icebreaker" messages. Nothing. (The courtesy replies are ALSO FREE, PEOPLE.) Then, out of the blue, I'm contacted by a nice and intelligent-seeming woman who has just moved to town. She wanted someone who could give her the guided tour, she said. It would my pleasure, I said. (While the woman was not exactly a beauty-pageant contestant--perfectly fine, as I am not exactly David Caruso over here--she was reasonably attractive and did seem pleasant, smart, and receptive to humor. She also liked kitties and was willing to contact me despite viewing my profile, which contains photos OF ME. Big points there.) Anyhoo. A short but pleasant e-mail exchange ensued, including some coy flirting that SHE initiated. (Really.) At last, I made the logical next move: "Let's figure out a good time to meet," I wrote, with a naive if not insane degree of optimistic cheer.
It's been a week now. What have I heard? That's right, reader: NOTHING. Now, I will be the first to admit that I'm oblivious to certain subtle signals that seem to be key in the mating dance. Indeed, I've even speculated that there's a secret dating codebook out there to which only I am not privy.* But how--please, for the love of God, TELL ME HOW--can the message "Let's figure out a good time to meet" spontaneously rewrite itself as "I am a psychotic person, and I plan to eat your liver. With some fava beans and a nice chianti." I'm so clearly NOT the kind of person who would kill a non-prostitute. *Sigh.*
*There is. Obviously.--Ed.
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Day 8034: No sexual activity.
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Alcohol kills. Alcohol scars. Seriously, people.
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Day 8033: No sexual activity.
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Inspired by Sarah's proud indifference to social convention,* I have decided to embark on a complete, unstinting, no-holds-barred pants embargo.** Yes: this includes underwear. Now who's with me??
The drawback (that's right, singular) to this plan is that my legs have never been...how can I put this delicately?...attractive. Or natural-looking. As in, they are stumpy, and they exhibit a degree of hairiness and whiteness that can be attained only under carefully controlled laboratory conditions. As in, even a brief and peripheral glimpse of them has been reputed to cause insanity and, with prolonged exposure, Republicanism. My attorneys are investigating the liability issues. I'll keep you posted.
*we're not sure, but we think there may have been public nudity involved
**when the weather gets nice. I'm not doing it now, for God's sake. Because that would be crazy.
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geektron2000's journal
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